SIMPLY ELABORATE blog

Archive for the ‘windsor’ Category

I can’t believe it’s already Saturday morning and the week’s gone by this quickly. I am a little hungover today due to the fact that last night K and I hosted a surprise party for B’s 20th birthday. Complete success. She didn’t suspect a thing.

I just got back from breakfast with my friend J from the cottage and our “summer boss” from the Georgian Grill. I got the call at 11:45 am to be ready in 10 minutes. They’re coming back soon to pick me up for a little casino fun before I have to go to work tonight.

Working. It sucks. But it’s gotta be done. Which sucks even more.

Maybe, if I go to the casino and play the 5¢ machines, I’ll win the jackpot and then, and then, I won’t ever have to work again.

There are these two girls that I always see at work, every shift, that are always looking to get drunk and always buy their drinks from me. For the past couple of times I’ve said to myself: “these girls cannot be 19, they are so tiny”. But I figure they’re in the place, so they have to be.

On Tuesday though, because I was so incredibly bored and really would have rather been at home studying for my midterm the next day instead of at work, I spent a lot of time talking to them, you know, “building the regular customer relationship”.

The first time, I got their names and stuff like that and asked them regular questions about whether or not they were having fun. The second time it was like old friends saying hi, and then it eventually got to them deeming I was trustworthy and the Avril Lavigne look-a-like confessing that she was actually only 17 and turning 18 in a couple of days. The Lisa Loeb look-a-like confessed to the same.

As the night progressed, my visits to them got fewer and far between because it started to get busy. But one time, I walked by them and noticed that my little tiny friend, I’ll call her Mini Avril because I can’t remember her name, was very upset. Not because she’d been slapped or found out that someone had passed on. I recognized the look on her face, as would any girl, in my opinion. She had this look as though she were going to fall apart in little pieces, crashing to the floor but she was somehow holding it in, the tears, the screams, and just hiding herself behind a pole being consoled by a friend away from the group she was with.

I had to stop. I asked her what was wrong, and she said nothing. I gave her a look and asked again. She then told me the classic boyfriend triangle problem she was having. She was upset because her ex-boyfriend and good friend (who was, incidently, also his ex-girlfriend) were flirting and “all over each other” and it got her really mad because, obviously, she was still “in love” with him.

I listened and nodded when supposed to but mostly I couldn’t believe that Mini Avril was so blind. Apparently the story went like this:

Mini Avril dated this guy for 9 months, he only cheated on her once, with her friend Mini Lisa, and then they broke up. Mini Lisa and the guy started to date. The guy, like, cheated on her 5 times. And now he’s dating one of their friends and he’s cheated on that girl with both Mini Avril and Mini-Lisa numerous times. Mini-Avril was upset because she kissed the guy last week and really wants to be with him because he is totally in love with her, after he only cheated on her once therefore he likes her the best, was ACTUALLY what she rationalized with me.

I stood there completely silent for a minute and tried to process her rationalizing and I really felt sorry for her. She actually did believe this guy loved her because he’d cheated on her the least out of all his girlfriends. I tried to tell her that maybe she and her friends should re-evaulate their friendships without even considering the guy, because obviously there are some trust issues there, and then ALL of them had to dump the guy because He’s Just Not That Into You. Although when I said the bit about He’s Just Not That Into You she kind of gave me a blank stare because I said with the sing song voice that I’ve been hearing about since these authors appeared on Oprah last September.

Then I realized that she probably hadn’t ever heard of the book due to the fact that we live in different generations and she still had hope in asshole guys.

I gave Mini Avril a kleenex and told her to smile because that guy (who look like a dirtier version of Keven Federline – if that’s even possible) was so not worth it and one day, if she stayed at home on Tuesday nights instead of drinking at places she shouldn’t be at so young, she’d realize it.

She smiled, said: “thanks, I think I will”, told me she’d see me Friday and went back to her friends.

I stood there, feeling a little bit unheard and chuckled to myself. I always thought that seventeen was the best year of my life (as thus far) but my trip down memory lane that night made me really, really happy that I am 20 and out of highschool.

Exams have arisen again. Midterms. I hate them. I hate studying for them. I hate procrastinating studying for them. Everything about them. But I know they must be done and because of that, I will do my best, which is all I could ever do anyway.

I just got home from my Speech class presentation. A friend of mine said I did well and seemed quite confident performing in front of 60 people, I, however, could barely hear myself over the sound of my beating heart. But I’m trying out this new thing that Jay-B was drilling in my head last week – nobody gives a shit about you (not meant to be rude)! It worked, a lot. For the 10 minutes before I went on, I kept telling myself; “you can do this, keep the bangs out of your face and don’t apologize if you screw up”. And I didn’t. I don’t think. And I didn’t say “um” or “uh” too much.

All in all. Not that bad. We’ll see what the mark says. Yikes.

On to Italian!

Ciao e ci vediamo!

The best thing about planned quiet evenings is the fact that almost always, it turns into a night of laughter, inside jokes and craziness, at least when it comes to my friends and I. K and I spent the evening at a friend’s house where we had all planned on an evening of Molly Ringwald movies and textbook readings. It began innocently enough with cupcake eating and me and BR making fun of the Pretty in Pink and Sixteen Candles scripts (both movies I’d never seen before) and the respective wardrobes for the films. Then we wanted to choose our third film … all of my choices got “vito-ed” and The Sound of Music was eventually picked. My objection? – Is it Easter? And are we 50? I moved on to downstairs to M’s room to join BR (who had given up on Chick Flicks right after the Sixteen Candles credits) and try and accomplish some homework.

Prepositions to travel to McDonalds came up and after my yelling at B that she is going to make me gain 15 pounds based on her temptations, I obviously caved and joined in on the walk to Mickey-Dee’s.

This is where the night gets really interesting. And when I almost died from laughter suffocation.

Right now, McDonald’s Happy Meals have the promotions for My Little Pony and include 5 colourful small horses to choose from for the meals. M and B both got one each while K and I laughed at them mockingly. M’s pony came with a 3 inch pink comb to brush the plastic animal’s 3 inch long hair. B’s came with a scrunchie. Yup. A scrunchie. This prompted much laughter between us and many stares from other patrons of this fateful McDonalds. M told her to put it in her hair, and she did, in a sideways ponytail. Between giggles I suggested that B tuck the bottom of her pants into her socks so that the fact that she was wearing open backed shoes in the middle of February would be apparent, along with the obvious fact that her pants were tucked into her socks. A man sitting behind us full out stared weirdly but that just made us laugh more.

When M went to go buy BR’s food, things got even crazier. I can’t even explain it without making the four of us sound absolutely deranged, however, I assure you it was a blast. You just had to be there. And know us inside out for it to be funny. When B agreed to throw her pony across the restaurant at M in line we knew we had to get out of there before they called the cops and reported four drunken university students – even though we hadn’t touched an ounze of alcohol.

In the parking lot, B’s slip-ons proved to not be a wise choice for our walk when she flipped on her ass crossing a snow bank and couldn’t manage to get up despite my attempts to help her. We just couldn’t stop laughing.

B managed to dump M (carrying take-out combo for BR and all) into the snow right outside their house and got ice all over the both of them. K and I screamed running up the stairs so we didn’t join in on the snow party and burst inside to BR finally getting to watch his choice movie for the night, Predator, starring Arnold pre-steroids. He looked at us like we were nuts and we laughed even more.

The thing about these evenings is that they are so unexpected but entirely enjoyed. It was just the thing I needed to get me out of my creative writing slump and post an entry I actually thought about writing. It also helped me to realize that the best thing is life is laughter suffocation (that feeling where you just can’t stop your diaphram from regurgitating air and stopping fresh oxygen from reaching your brain), the power of a good friendship and the sound of fresh screaming laughter being as sweet as the smell of freshly cut grass.

The fifth play-fight of the evening is commencing downstairs and I’m just about to go join in on it. I can hear the pleading “stop I can’t take it anymore” laughter all the way up the stairs.

A random line I just picked up: “DON’T PINCH MY NIPPLE!!!”

But I’m entirely confident that she did.

Sometimes I feel as though I don’t even have a blog anymore because I’m filling my time with everything but posting for crying out loud.

Tonight’s a big night. I’m going to be on the radio. Me. Em. Whatever you’d like to call me. I’m nervous. Because I don’t know a thing about radio broadcasting because I haven’t taken that course yet. And now I’ll be on the air for 2 straight hours.

Initially it was supposed to be just me, but I figured there’s no way I can do this on my own without any prior knowledge, because I’m sorry, but one 20 minute training session doesn’t even begin to cover all the stuff I’m supposed to know about being on air.

Plus I think I said yes to doing this a little too quickly. I have to do a presentation about myself for tomorrow’s speech class and I’m not nearly as prepared as I should be (ie. I’m not). But I couldn’t turn it down.

I’m on the air in less than 2 hours. Yikes!

On another note, in addition to my brand spanking new job at RUSH, I’ve been offered the position of booking manager for my friend DJ Ruckus. So I’m continually being a busy bee.

Fun times. Busy times. Tired, tired, tired times.