Archive for the ‘favourites’ Category
do you have a boyfriend, sexy?
Over the past summer months, I’ve had to deal with hot sweaty weather, broken English accents, long hours at work and the most bothersome, incessant questions about my singledom status. Why are you single, they ask. And every time I want to roll my eyes and ask them why they think it’s okay to ask such a rude question. Is it even a rude question? Which is why I probably don’t ask back. Is it rude to ask why someone doesn’t have a boyfriend? But as I write that, it occurs to me that it’s an unanswerable question to begin with. WHY don’t you have a boyfriend? How is someone supposed to answer that? What possible valid reasons can there be, how are you supposed to know what they even are?
Usually I sigh and shrug my shoulders, replying that I live too far away to have a relationship (keeping in mind that I receive this same question no matter where I live) and that I’m too difficult for some boys to handle. Which is probably also a lie since I’m not the typical clingy girlfriend guys supposedly hate. Give me my space, I enjoy hanging out with the girls, I laugh at everything and it takes a lot to piss me off if I’m not related to you.
What I can’t stand is the assumption that there’s something wrong with me because I don’t have a boyfriend. And the fact that even while I was growing up I never had a boy on my arm, it just wasn’t me. And maybe it still isn’t. But now that “older” and get asked this question at least twice a week it bothers me because I’m afraid that maybe I will start to believe that I don’t have a boyfriend because there is something wrong with me.
It’s on days like today that I’m reminded of why there really isn’t something wrong with me, but rather with the options that this city leaves me with to choose from. I was walking to meet my sister at her work listening to my MP3 player and enjoying my background theme music to the sounds of the city streets when I came across a group of guys leaning over cement architecture on the sidewalk. As soon as I saw them, I knew what was coming and braced myself.
“Hey, you’re sexy,” one of them shouts to me.
“Oh my God, Jesus, girl, you’re so fiiiine,” another one goes.
“Girl, come over here sexy. Come on, come on over,” the third joins.
I think at this point they see my headphones and think I can’t hear them when in fact I can perfectly and it just goes on despite my creased eyebrows and curled frown I give them.
Is this who I’m supposed to date? People who snarl comments at me while I’m walking along a public street like I’m some sort of dog? The same thing happened last week when I walked home from Etobicoke to Mississauga due to a massive fight with my father resulting in me treking home for a six hour long walk. The walk was long, but enjoyable, except for the countless men who hung out their car windows, honked, shouted and BARKED at me. Barked, just as if I were a dog. I wasn’t aware that people even did that, how naive I was. Is this really flattering to anyone? Does any girl actually turn around and go, “thank you!” or respond in a manner that can make one believe this behaviour is acceptable? If they do, I guess I missed the memo on the feminism backtrack of 2005.
So I’m single. And I have been for the past two years. And I’m not ashamed to say it. See? I’ll say it again. And I’m typing it so it’s even more official. I’m SINGLE. And I will not be made to feel as though there is something wrong with me because of it. If I meet someone that actually holds my interest past the attractiveness of their face, it’ll happen. Until then I’m a goal oreinted person and I’m sorry but “finding a boyfriend” isn’t on one of my TO-Do lists. But I’m not really sorry.
Especially when “do you have a boyfriend, sexy?” slurred out of some random guy at a bar is the pick up of line of choice.